I’m still bored, still in the lecture. So, I’m going to write some more. What should I write about?
I’m hungry! I wonder what there will be for lunch. Somebody said there would be a lunch from a caterer. I feel like an anorexic saying this, but I don’t like food I can’t weigh or don’t know what’s in it at the moment. I want to have control. I hope I’m not getting another eating disorder…
I am hungry and want to eat, but I also want to lose those 700 grams until Sunday! And I hate eating “in public”. I can’t savor the food at all, all I think about is not dropping anything, not making a sound, not looking too ugly, not eating too much. My stomach is in knots, and I feel like I can’t digest what I ate. But I guess I will have to eat or appear extremely unsocial and strange and I don’t want that, either.
I bought apples, WW-approved bread, porridge oats and WW fromage frais this morning. Mostly to try, because I never tried that bread and fromage frais, and apples are in season and the oats are for tomorrow’s breakfast. Eating warm porridge before ballet class is great! On Saturdays, I have time to cook, and it fills me up and lasts without being heavy, and I like it a lot, made with milk and sugar or sweetener. I don’t know whether it’s WW-approved with milk, but I don’t care.
Back from lunch, which was fun (a little). The caterers put up small tables complete with white tablecloths, three forks, bread plate etc. in the hall and waiting area of our clinic. We all felt luxurious sitting down to a three-course meal with wine in the middle of the waiting room. None of us expected that! I guess I ate ok. I had a small portion of spaetzle, some beef stroganoff, lentil salad, glass noodle salad, a mouthful of kidney beans and water. If only I could drink wine without feeling drunk after the first sip! I can’t drink, because it goes to my head immediately. And not in a nice way, I just feel ill and hot and want to lie down. I love wine and cocktails and liqueurs, but well… Maybe this is good for me.